Well, here we go again: another area of biblical reformation at BBC. But, of course, this is how it is supposed to be.
The sixteenth-century Reformers were both infamously and famously dubbed “Protestants” because of their propensity to protest against an unbiblical status quo. But they did not expect their protesting to end with them. Rather, they encouraged ongoing biblical reformation with the slogan, “Ecclesia semper reformanda est.” That is, the church must always be reformed and reforming. This is an ongoing necessity for a local church that seeks to be increasingly conformed to our Head, the Lord Jesus Christ (see Ephesians 4:11–16). As we are exposed to biblical truth, primarily through the public and corporate ministry of the word, we will realise our shortcomings and then, with minds transformed by truth (orthodoxy), a changed pattern of behaviour (orthopraxy) will result. So with the matter of singleness and marriage.
In recent studies (thankfully, the uncomfortable sections of 1 Corinthians 7 are finished—I think!), some have experienced a somewhat profound awareness of Jesus’ teaching that in the new creation there will be no marriage (Matthew 22:30). For those married, this revelation can be disconcerting, and for those who are single this teaching might provide some relief. But for both, it should provide perspective when it comes to our marital status. At the least, it should remind us, in the words of Eugene Peterson, that “God, not our marital status, defines our life.” In my view, this perspective is a necessary reformation for BBC.
When it comes to understanding the “gifts” of marriage and singleness, some of us get it, some of us are a bit muddled, and perhaps some of us don’t get it at all. Regardless, all of us should be encouraged that God is at work reforming our congregational appreciation and application of the biblical paradigm of singleness and marriage. Let me mention just three areas of this reformation.
First, we are reforming in our thinking of how we view those who are single.
Too often those of us who are married define those who are single by what they are not (married) rather than what they are (a brother or sister in Christ). Marital status matters—the apostle Paul used a good amount of ink writing about it—but one’s spiritual status matters the most. We should therefore think of one another in terms such as a brother/sister in Christ who happens to be single, or as a brother/sister in Christ who happensto be married. By creating a vast distinction according to one’s marital status, we often build a barrier to meaningful communion of the saints, a barrier which Jesus by his death, burial, and resurrection, tore down. This was a problem in the early church between Jew and Gentile (Ephesians 2:11–22), and I wonder if we are not guilty of doing so between single Christians and married Christians. When it comes to such manmade divisions in the church, let me say what Ronald Reagan boldly exhorted Mikhaeil Gorbachev at the Berlin Wall (I’m revealing my age): “Tear down that wall!”
Second, we are reforming in how we treat those who are single.
In our attempts to appreciate God’s gift to the church of single brothers/sisters, we can wrong-headedly view them as gifts in the sense of being babysitters, ministry leaders (after all, we too erroneously think, “they have so much free time”), etc. Though no doubt our single brothers/sisters can be a great blessing in these areas, we dare not assign mere utilitarian value to them. No, they are spiritual bricks in the wall (see 1 Peter 2:4–10) building up the church, like any other member, using their spiritual gifts which cast a unique hue through their gift of being single. That is, by letting their light shine through loving Christ and his church, God’s manifold grace is displayed through the unique prism of their singleness. Therefore, let us steward well these gifts of our fellow church members, who happen to be single.
Third, we are reforming concerning the idolisation of marriage and family.
Such idolatry is not ubiquitous among Christian marriages, but, let’s be honest, it is certainly a temptation for many. We who are married can become so focused on “hubby” or “wifey” and/or “kiddies” that we neglect our single sisters/brothers in the church. For instance, are we so busy with our children that we neglect discipling single church members, including young people. Or do we so prioritise our marriage that we shut the doors of hospitality on those who are single? Perhaps we need to better exemplify to our children what it means to be a part of a church family in which our brothers and sisters should be seen as our children’s brothers and sisters as well. Jill is persuaded that our spending time with young adults and young marrieds when we were younger went a long way towards cultivating in our children a love for the church. Thank you. And Amen.
A whole lot more could and should and will be said about this matter in the weeks ahead as we study the rest of 1 Corinthians 7. But for now, allow my ponderings to assist you to ponder our church’s need for reforming singleness and marriage.
Grateful for our church family,
Doug